without you *cough pyschotic cough cough*

Without you i know the pain of a razor against my wrist,
as soon as you left my arms, you were suddenly missed.

Without you im losing all this blood,
you gave me the strength to do what i thought i never could.

Without you there would be no reason for me to have a heart,
for if you left, my world would just fall apart.

Without you i''d want to end my life,
all it''d take is a few slices with this knife.
Without you ill take charge of my own fate,
ill end it all because if your not here, heavens not worth the wait.

since when did poetry require answers?

I liked poetry better,
when I could write my poems,
ask questions, and
no one would answer.

I liked it better when everything was rhetorical,
people gave opinions,
but never did they answer.

I preferred poetry when it was a freedom of expression,
instead of people answering rhetorical questions.

Maybe I misunderstand flattery,
but I''ll pass on all suggestions

Throw ME a rating,
a compliment,
but please,
don''t answer fake questions.

I liked poetry more,
when if there was one thing you realized,
it was one thing I did better.

But like everything,
poetry now included,
you''re always arrogantly diluted

You criticize all that I do,
When really,
the person who really has the problem,
has always been you.

Poems are about expression,
Poems are about feeling,
poems are not meant to be drained lifeless with politics and lack luster
meanings.

I have my own life,
and you have yours,
so why does everything I do,
you think revolves around yours?

I really do hope you google my name,
and this is the first thing that comes up,
and you realize that you''re making it hard not to resent you.

i know your still here

Even though you''re not with me
I see you all the time
In my thoughts and in my dreams
You''re never hard to find

Everyday i think
"Well maybe you''ll come back"
But then reality hits me
It hits me like a smack

I know you''re in a better place
But again i still see
That here is where you belong
Here...with me

I didn''t tell you how much i loved you
But now that you''re gone i think i should say
You will never leave my heart
Even till this very day

the new me

All the while i a have been
Living up to your expectation
Losing all my relation
I had wit both my friends and lover
Surprise surprise
I''ve grown,
Although it hasn''t showing,
I''ve shed the old skin and
Bringing the new into a better light
A better atmosphere.
Cause this girl for one
Aint gonna take those shit nowhere.
Spend my days and night
Praying that i could see the light
Now that i have
I''m not going down without a fight...

Out with the old!
Bring in the new!
Cause no one will be walking in my shoe.
For one,
This girl''s getting rid of those catalyst
And rebuild my life over again
This time doing it my way.
New friends!
New family!
I cant be sad all the time.
I''ve got to have fun
And see what the world is made of.

One day...
Just one day...
This girl is going to fly like dove
Showering down to you my love.
Although you are not worth it.
I think you deserve it.
Cause without you
There wouldn''t be this change.
So you wont be missed...
But!
You''ll also not be forgotten.

you and i

I dreamt this dream of you and I,
and all my fears were gone,
you sang me a loving song,
oh why oh why did i have to wake,
to this lonely world,
where you and i cant be,
but soon i will fall back to sleep,
where i can see,
and where we will be again!

to teddy from a lost child

Teddy, I've been bad again
My mommy told me so;
I'm not quite sure what I did wrong
But I thought you might know.

When I woke this morning
I knew that she was mad
Cause she was crying awful hard,
And yelling at my dad.

I tried my best to be real good
And do just what she said
I cleaned my room all by myself,
I even made my bed.

But I spilled milk on my good shirt
When she yelled at me to hurry
And I guess she didn't hear me,
When I told her I was sorry

Cause she hit me awful hard, you see,
And called me funny names;
And told me I was really bad
And I should be ashamed.

When I said "I love you Mommy",
I guess she didn't understand;
Cause she yelled at me to shut my mouth
,Or I'd get smacked again

So, I came up here to talk to you
Please tell me what to do
Cause I really love my mommy,
And I know she loves me, too

And I don't think my mommy means,
To hit quite so hard;
I guess sometimes, grown ups forget
How big they really are

So Teddy, I wish you were real
And you weren't just a bear
Then you could help me find a way
To tell mommies everywhere

To please try to understand
How sad it makes us feel;
Cause the outside pain soon goes a way,
But the inside never heals

And if we could make them listen,
Maybe the'd understand;
So other children just like me
Wouldn't have to hurt again

But, for now, I guess I'll hold you tight,
And pretend the pain's not there.
I know you'd never hurt me,
So goodnight, Teddy Bear...

friend like no other

You''re always there to motivate me
Putting out your best to set my soul free
Of the heavy burdens that i have to bear
And to cast away all the things that i fear

The day you told me that you weren''t well
It made me mad...as mad as hell''
Cause my biggest fear
Was knowing that one day I''ll no longer have you here.

I dont ever wanna tell you goodbye
Just thinking about it makes me wanna cry
But regardless of what happens you''ll be in my heart, always and forever''
Cause you''re a great friend...a friend like no other.
Dedicated to one of my best friends in the whole wide world...<3>

hahahahahahahaha ive run out of poems oh wait no i havent im just to dam lazy to post more lmfao

Screams

She sits alone in her room.
Just listening to all of the worlds rejection.
The whispers and the screams.
The nightmares and the dreams.
Out of all this, her own voice is the loudest.
But her screams impale and suffocate all others. The whispers are her alter
ego telling her she can't, she never will, and she shouldn't attempt.
Her worries spell themsevles out in tea leaves.
Her fragile, broken, damaged heart is being choked with barbed wire of her own doing.
Pins and needles: numb her body.
Pins and needles: put her to sleep.

She awakes in darkness of her own devastation.
Skin is cold like the pavement she walks upon.
Her demons chase her through the garden of thorns and weeds.
Thorns: digging in under her fingernails.
Weeds: grabbing at her ankles.

Pins and needles: tangle her body.
Pins and needles: wake her up.

Scared and alive, sitting up in bed with damp black hair sticking to her face
Saltwater tears burning the cuts on her arms.
She runs hot bathwater to wash away her sins.
Scrubbing her skin raw, she screams and screams.
Breaking the mirror, busting eardrums.
She goes to the medicine cabinet, and down every pill and liquid that she can find.
Bottles fall to floor, surroudning her body.

Shadows dance over the walls.
Rats squeal in the floors.
Water dries on her red skin.

Pins and needles: numb her body.
Pins and needles: forever put her to sleep.

"Waiting To Die"

“Waiting To Die”

Push me Because I’m daring you
Shove me over the edge
Isn’t that what you want for me?
Obviously you care not

As I rot in a hole
Waiting to die
I hear you childish laughs
Ringing in my ears
I scream!
I cry!
Leave me alone
While I wait to die

Ask me if I’ll wait for you
I won’t sit and twiddle my thumbs
As you play petty games
“He said She said”
Who the hell are they?
Get your story straight
I know when you’re lying anyway

You’re unbearable
I can’t understand you
Or your twisted way of thoughts
Think like a normal person
Then I’ll see the next blow coming

You love me
You love me not
Best friend
Or enemy? I can’t tell which is which

One moment I’m the savior
The next I’m a used rag
Ask me if I’ll fall for you again

Twinkling....

Twinkle twinkle,
Fucking jerk,
I hope you rot in hell.
I took that penny that I found,
And tossed it in a well.
I made a wish that you would die,
And then began to cry,
I stomped my feet in the dirt,
And screamed it to the sky.
I threw a rock into the pond,
Then my heart broke in two,
No matter what,
I can’t escape
The simple fact that I never liked you

Real - Or Not ?

Real is when your father dies

When your mother lies

When your best friend cries

Real is when your grandma has taken ill

When humans killWhen you''ve lost your will

Unreal is the loss of a game

The fashion stays the same

Unreal is the glory of fame

The rich burning of flame

Real is what happens close to you

What happens to your heart

Real is what you chose to do

What you chose to be a part.

Real is a dream of fate

A dream where emotion sturs

Real is what you love to hate

And where little actually occurs